DropMeNot
by Taliax
Summary: Sora doesn't hate a lot of things, but the Drop system is one of them. Being spat out of one universe and into another can get awfully annoying. Crackfic. Spoilers for Dream Drop Distance.
1. Should've gone to those meetings, Sora

**A/N: So, how I spawned this odd thing… I can think of so many awkward situations the Drop Gauge could cause. XD Plus I wondered what happens to Sora when the player is controlling Riku, or vice versa. And then there was some inspiration from some of Raberba girl's stories where the characters have off-screen lives. This is definitely a crackfic. :P**

Suddenly, right in the middle of a very important cutscene, Sora was smacked in the face by a wave of dizziness. The buildings of Traverse Town contorted like he was looking at them in a funhouse mirror, and Neku and the black-coat-guy blurred out of sight.

"What? Why am I so… sleepy?" He clutched his head, trying hard to cling to consciousness, but he would've had better luck fighting knockout gas. He passed out on the hard ground.

Riku was going to tease him forever if he found him like this. What kind of Keyblade Master fell asleep at the very beginning of the test?

"Huh?" Neku paused in his fight with the black-coat guy to look behind him. Sora had seemingly dropped out of existence.

Oh well, back to fighting.

XXX

"Nrgh… Where am I?" Sora blinked, feeling completely refreshed aside from a very annoying headache, which seemed to be fading quickly. Probably from hitting his head on the ground in Traverse Town… wait, why wasn't he in Traverse Town? He was sprawled on plush carpet that smelled like it had been vacuumed recently. He could hear the sound of a vacuum, too.

"Oh, hey, Sora." The vacuum turned off. "Wasn't expecting the whole 'Drop' thing to just spit you on the floor. You're okay, right? If you're dizzy try not to throw up on the carpet, I just cleaned it."

"Roxas?" Sora asked, recognizing the voice and standing unsteadily. The voice laughed.

"Ven, remember? I've been here since two games ago. Well, three now." Oh, Ven. That made sense. Sora had thought his voice sounded too hyper to be Roxas.

"Hi, Ven!" Sora replied cheerily, shaking off the last traces of his headache. "Sorry, I'm still a little out of it. Where am I?"

Ven grinned and gestured grandly to the hotel lobby-looking room. "Nomura thought we deserved a new place to stay, with the new game and all. Don't worry, we moved your stuff already. You get the biggest room, lucky." He didn't sound too jealous, though. "But you can see that later. Aqua probably wants to explain some stuff to you."

Sora was pretty confused by the info-dump. When did they move, exactly? Probably as soon as he left for the Mark of Mastery Exam. Why wasn't he told about it, though? And what did Aqua need to explain?

"Okay." Sora followed Ven into an elevator, where some waiting music that sounded like "Lazy Afternoons" played in the background. "Cool, the last place only had stairs!" Not that stairs were that much of a pain, but Sora was fascinated by elevators.

Ven grinned. "Just wait 'til you see the swimming pool. It's no ocean, but there's a huge water slide. Demyx's been playing there all day."

"Awesome!"

They stopped at floor fourteen, and Ven led the way down a hall to a spacious room at the end. Sora gasped at the numerous huge screens lining the walls.

"Riku!" He ran to the biggest screen, almost tripping over an out-of-place beanbag and the person sitting in it. Sora said a quick apology without looking to see who it was. He was more interested in what was on the screen: Riku talking to a boy who introduced himself as Joshua.

"Idiot, I'm trying to watch here!" Vanitas got up and shoved Sora aside before plopping back down on his beanbag.

"Sorry, Vani." Sora grinned. Vanitas growled.

"I _told _you never to call me that."

"Lay off him, Vanitas," Terra said from the beanbag next to him.

"Why should I? He's an idiot."

Sora shrugged, ignoring Vanitas's usual insults, and went back to watching Riku. He and Ventus had to stay standing up because the two other boys were using the only bean bags. It was strange to see a cast of characters like that simply watching TV, but there was a constant truce on this side of the Fourth Wall that kept Vanitas from attacking them, or vice versa.

"Hello, Sora," Aqua greeted, walking up from behind him. She turned to face Ven, who had been prodding the spikes of Vanitas's hair while the others were watching Riku. "Ven, are you finished with your chores?" Sora wondered when Aqua had started assigning chores – if he remembered correctly, that had been Saïx's job since _Kingdom Hearts II_. Maybe it was because Saïx – or Isa, he wasn't sure if he had changed his name back or not – was needed somewhere _Dream Drop Distance? _Sora didn't know. Namura wasn't going to give them all the spoilers, even though their memories from this realm didn't carry over inside the Fourth Wall.

Ven hid his hands behind his back and summoned his most innocent look. "Everything looks clean to me."

Aqua put her hands on her hips. "I told you, we can't treat this castle like we did the last one. Remember the melted ice cream drops all over the carpet?"

"But we just moved here!" Ven protested. "There aren't any ice cream drops to clean up!"

"_Ven_," Aqua said in her motherly "I'm-warning-you-young-man" tone, and Ven sighed.

"Fine, I'll finish vacuuming." He trudged off after flicking Vanitas's hair one last time, provoking a stream of threats from the black-haired boy. Aqua rolled her eyes but stifled a laugh.

"Nomura decided that with a change of castle, there should also be a change of duties. I organize the chores and other assignments around here now," she explained, "so I'm trying to get everyone in the habit of keeping this place clean. Not that most of them listen…" Aqua gave Terra a light punch on the shoulder, and Sora laughed.

"Hey, this is way more important." Terra didn't take his eyes off the screen. "Riku's technically my protégé. I need to follow his progress."

Vanitas snorted. "Yeah, right. You're just too lazy to clean the toilets."

"It'll get done; I always took care of my chores in the Land of Departure. Besides, I don't see _you _washing any windows." Terra glared at Vanitas, who smirked.

"My Unversed did that hours ago. _I'm _a bad guy, and I actually help out around here." It was rather ironic, since Vanitas had always weaseled his way out of chores when Saïx was in charge. Sora wondered if his change had anything to do with Aqua.

"Only because you don't have to do any work yourself. You just have your minions do it."

Vanitas growled and shoved Terra, apparently tired of the verbal battle. They began arguing and wrestling with each other until Aqua ordered them – in her "mother-demanding-respect" tone – to settle down. Vanitas smirked, apparently having come out with the upper hand, while Terra crossed his arms.

"I apologize, Sora." She sighed. "Riku will have to Drop soon. Follow me; I'll explain as much as I can about the new schedule."

Sora kind of wanted to keep watching Riku, but he nodded. "Right."

Aqua took him to a different part of the large screen-covered room, where they couldn't hear Terra cheering on Riku and Vanitas snarking about how much cooler his Unversed were than the Dream Eaters.

"So what's up with all this 'dropping' stuff?" Sora asked. Aqua pointed to a screen – much smaller than the one Riku was currently on – that showed Sora's sleeping form next to a filling-up gauge. "Huh? That's not me! I'm awake!"

Aqua shook her head, stifling a laugh. "When you Dropped, you fell asleep in the Sleeping World and woke up here, where you will stay until Riku Drops." Sora wasn't sure if that meant he was asleep now or not; the whole "Realm of Sleep" and "Sleeping Keyholes" and everything else about dreaming and sleeping was too confusing. "Did Nomura not brief you on this?"

"Oh!" Sora smacked himself on the forehead, wincing when it brought back his earlier headache. "Riku said something about a meeting last week…" He rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. "But I overslept."

Aqua sighed, muttering something that sounded like "Just as bad as Ven…" Sora smiled in apology.

"Well, I'll have to explain that instead of what's going on around here, then," Aqua said. "When you wake up in the Sleeping World, you'll see a gauge beside your HP bar. This is called the Drop Gauge, and when it runs out, you'll appear back here, regardless of what you were doing at the time."

"Wait, you mean I'm going to just pass out? _Again?" _Sora gaped. "What if I'm talking to someone? Or in a boss battle?"

Aqua shrugged. "It won't matter. Nomura decided this was the best way to tie your story and Riku's together, since Terra, Ven, and my stories felt separated in _Birth by Sleep._"

"Riku?" Sora instantly perked up, ignoring the latter part of her sentence. "You mean he has to do this too?" That's right, she'd said something about Riku Dropping earlier, but he hadn't exactly understood then.

"Yes, you'll return to your adventure when he Drops here."

Sora punched the air happily. "Yes! He can't tease me about sleeping during the test!"

Aqua laughed. "No, I suppose not." She took a glance at the screen, where Sora's gauge was pixels away from being full. "He'll Drop soon. You should sit; I wouldn't want you to hit your head when you fall unconscious."

"Oh. Thanks, Aqua," Sora said when she pulled a chair (where had that come from? The only furniture he'd seen earlier was the two beanbags) over for him. "Hey, is Kairi around here anywhere?"

Aqua shook her head. "Well, she _is _here, but I don't know where. I'm afraid you'll Drop back before you can find her."

"Yeah…" Sora sighed. They'd said their goodbyes before he went to take the Mark of Mastery Exam, but he missed her already. Someday he hoped he could go on an adventure with her _and _Riku, but he didn't want to put her in harm's way. At least he knew that she wielded a keyblade now… Maybe they would get to go together someday. He knew she was as tired of being left behind as he was of leaving her behind.

He was so caught up in thoughts of Kairi that he made a startled sound when an alarm started blaring, jumping up and summoning his keyblade. "What's that? Heartless? Nobodies? Dream Eaters?" He forgot for the moment that this place – if it was anything like the last castle – was protected from monsters of all kinds.

Aqua smiled. "That sound means Riku's in Bonus Time."

"Oh. I knew that." Sora sat down, not having a clue what Bonus Time even was, and Aqua laughed.

"You said Riku attended that meeting, right?"

"Yeah…"

"Good, I won't have to brief him too." Aqua ruffled Sora's hair. He was used to it; she often treated him just like Ven. "Good luck out there."

Sora nodded. "Thanks," he replied over the sound of the alarm. It was too bad he would forget this when he went back to the Sleeping World, but at least he wouldn't be utterly confused when he returned to this world again. "Tell Riku hi for me, okay? And Kairi, if you see her."

"I will." Aqua smiled.

And Sora dropped.

**A/N: I didn't get a chance to explain this very well, but the in-game world is what the characters consider the real world. The castle (which resembles a hotel) is for all the characters who are supposed to be dead or aren't in the game at the moment. So, for example, Kairi's in the castle because she doesn't do anything in 3D, but Axel-I-mean-Lea, even though he's not on-screen most of the time, is still in the in-game world looking for Isa. Hopefully that makes sense. I guess it's not too terribly important.**

**Anyway, all the drabbles after this are just going to be awkward moments caused by the Drop Gauge. They'll probably be from Sora's POV, but I might throw in some Riku ones if I feel like it or get ideas. The main reason for this chapter was to set up the later ones. I'm just going to update sporadically until I get bored or run out of ideas, at which point I'll slap a "complete" label on it.**


	2. Sleep isn't sacred anymore

**A/N: Just so you know, the title is supposed to be Drop-Me-Not, not DropMeNot. Stupid FFN. -.-**

Sora grew to have a love-hate relationship with the Drop Gauge. Mostly hate.

The annoying siren assaulted his ears when he was sleeping in Traverse Town's inn. He yelped, tumbling out of bed and dragging the heavy blankets with him onto the floor. "Ow…"

He stumbled around in the dark, hurrying to throw his clothes on so he didn't Drop into Castle Lampshade – Ven said it was named after some trope, but Sora hadn't really understood the explanation behind it – in his underwear. It was stupid for the Drop Gauge to keep depleting when he was _sleeping. _Was nothing sacred anymore?

Unfortunately, he wasted precious seconds detangling himself from the blankets, and the it was difficult to find anything in the dark, so he was only half-dressed by the time he Dropped.

XXX

Sora dashed through Castle Lampshade, hoping he could get from the lobby to his room before anyone caught him in only his jacket and boxers. No such luck.

He crashed into someone – who was painfully sturdy – as he rounded a corner.

"M-Marluxia?" He stuttered, mortified at the Final Boss he had once killed seeing him missing some important articles of clothing. The pink-haired man stared at him in surprise for a moment, then smirked.

"And people call me feminine." He walked away, leaving Sora very, very embarrassed at his choice of paopu-print boxers.

**A/N: I feel pretty bad for doing this to Sora… *sweatdrop* I haven't been on TVtropes in forever, so I can't explain "Lampshading" well. The idea for "Castle Lampshade" was spawned with Xelac in the planning for a different fic that never grew past a plot bunny, sadly, so I decided to recycle it here.**


	3. Rumble Racing

The Drop Gauge didn't just annoy Sora when it emptied. It could be just as annoying when it finished filling back up.

"Yes!" Sora cheered, holding down the X button on his PSP so hard he was starting to lose feeling in his thumb. "I'm taking first place for sure!" It was a welcome change from playing against Riku, who always beat him.

"Come on!" Ven tried to make his avatar go faster, but the glider was already at its maximum speed. "Why are we playing this on PSPs when we could play it for real?"

"I don't know how to use my glider," Sora replied. Plus playing as Aqua was way better; her glider could shoot laser-arrows.

"Oh, yeah. I gotta teach you sometime." Ven rammed Sora's glider – technically Aqua's in the game – from behind and laughed.

"You're really good at this," Sora complimented even though he was now behind.

"Well, I've had practice. I got one hundred percent completion on _Birth by Sleep, _y'know." Ven smiled smugly.

"Wow! I did that on _Kingdom Hearts II." _Sora wasn't purposely trying to brag; he just wanted Ven to know he'd done something cool, too. He wasn't entirely sure why he'd spent so much time on KHII after going through those events in real life…

Ven grinned at him. "Well, KHII doesn't have Rumble Racing."

That it didn't, but Sora was still gaining on Ventus again. He'd almost caught up when his Bonus Time alarm started blaring.

"Aw, not now!" He had how much time? Thirty seconds or so? There were still two laps left!

"What did you say about winning for sure?" Ven teased playfully. It _had _been kind of dumb of him to declare that back when he was only on his second lap…

"I'll still win! I'll just have to do it faster." Sora rammed Ven, ramped onto a ledge, and blew past a few NPCs. Hard as he tried, though, the gauge ran out just when the finish line came into view.

Sora passed out and dropped his PSP. Ven laughed and rode his glider to victory as Sora Dropped back through the Fourth Wall.

**A/N: Sora's just not going to catch a break in this, is he. :P I don't have anything against Sora (except that he killed Demyx; that was completely uncalled for 3:). It's just way too much fun to do stuff like this to him. ^^;**


	4. Moogles can be jerks

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Don't worry about me discontinuing this out of nowhere; I'll be sure to leave a note in the last one I plan on posting. And since this is a drabble series, I might update again if I get an idea out of nowhere even after I label it complete.**

"Come on! Riku said something about the economy being lousy, but this is ridiculous!" Sora yelled at the moogle.

"It's merely the law of supply and demand, kupo," the moogle replied. Sora wasn't sure what that meant. Riku could probably explain it, but he was in the other Traverse Town.

"But seven hundred munny? That's crazy!"

"That's the price, kupo. Why don't you destroy a few Dream Eaters and come back when you have enough, kupo?"

"I don't have time! Look, I just need some more Drop-Me-Nots for this one boss-" Sora flinched at the sound of Bonus Time activating. "I _really _don't have time for this. How about… uh…." He dug around in his inventory. "I've got a hi-potion… oh wait, that bottle's empty…" The blaring alarm was doing nothing to help him rummage faster. It wouldn't be a problem to sell off a few extra commands, except that he'd already done so yesterday. Drop-Me-Nots – and the unfair inflation of the moogle shops' prices – had sucked almost all of his munny.

The moogle must've had some sympathy, because it offered, "I'll bargain with you, kupo. How about a Drop-Me-Not for half price, plus that empty potion bottle?"

Sora frowned, confused. "What do you need the bottle for?"

"What do you think I do with my potions once I synthesize them, kupo?" If the moogle's eyes ever opened, Sora was sure it would roll them.

"That makes sense." Sora handed over the bottle and reached his hand deep into one of his many pockets to look for his munny. Unfortunately for him, as soon as he handed the correct amount over to the moogle, his Drop Gauge ran out.

"Sayonara, kupo."

"Oh, come on!" Sora yelled right before he dropped.

The moogle swapped shop shifts with the next moogle, who would have to deal with a very upset Sora when he Dropped back.

**A/N: I think the concept worked better in my head… ^^;; I don't think moogles are really that mean, but it was too amusing to resist. **

**I'm accepting requests; leave a review if you want to suggest an amusing situation. No promises, but I'll probably do a drabble for it.**


	5. Ice cream on the battlefield

**A/N: As requested by protoave14, a boss reacting to Sora dropping in the middle of the battle!**

Was Xemnas this difficult to beat the first time? Sora couldn't remember. He _did _remember that he hated being hit with skyscrapers. That hadn't changed.

His low-HP siren was blaring so loud that he almost didn't hear the Bonus Time alarm. Once he did, he grinned, only to be hit in the face by a volley of lasers. He blocked most of them, leaving him only hanging on by a few green pixels. _Only have to hold on for a few more seconds…_

Sora spammed dodge-roll, casting Curaga when his command gauge for it was filled again–

"There!"

– Only to have all the HP that had been recovered knocked out of him with Xemnas's kick. Sora knew he should've spent even more time maxing out his Dream Eaters' Ability Link boards; Cure Boost or Magic Haste would've been really useful right now.

But he would be okay. He only had to last ten more seconds, and then he'd Drop back to Castle Lampshade and go get sea-salt ice cream with Roxas and Xion (who were feeling lonely without Axel-I-mean-Lea around) like he promised. He kept dodge-rolling until his Bonus Time finally ran out.

It was the first time Sora had been happy to Drop.

XXX

Naturally, Xemnas was a little shocked when Sora disappeared in the middle of the boss battle. It wasn't like the young keyblade wielder to run away in the middle of a fight, and there wasn't anywhere he could've run away to, anyway. It wasn't like he controlled Void and could make himself suddenly disappear.

After puzzling over this situation for a few moments, Xemnas called for Young Xehanort (who hated being called "young", and thus took the new name of Impetus, at least for the time being, since it made him sound cool) and informed him.

"Sora must have Dropped," Impetus deducted. "Surely you knew?"

"Is this a normal occurrence? I was not informed of this," Xemnas replied in a somewhat put-off manner. He hated being talked down to by a younger version of himself.

Impetus smirked. "Master Xehanort thought it unimportant to debrief _every _vessel."

Xemnas scowled. He was used to leading an Organization. Since that particular plot had ended in mostly-failure (surely recruiting Xigbar and Saïx were important achievements, though), he was far down in the ranks of the new Organization XIII. Ansem Seeker of Darkness was lower than him, but that did nothing for Xemnas's self-esteem when Xigbar, his previous insubordinate and not even an original form of Xehanort, was now above him. It was positively embarrassing.

"Will Sora return?" Xemnas asked.

"Yes. Meanwhile, Riku is progressing through the castle. I must return to Master Xehanort to prepare for his arrival."

"What am I supposed to do in the mean time?" Surely he wasn't expected to sit in an empty battlefield and do nothing?

Impetus shrugged. "Take a nap, write a love letter to your destroyed fake Kingdom Hearts, it isn't my concern."

Xemnas would've sliced through his younger incarnation if he hadn't disappeared through a corridor at that instant. How dare he insult his beautiful Kingdom Hearts! She was a lovely collection of burning rage and envy, carefully pieced together one heart at a time… Impetus hadn't known her. Of course he wouldn't appreciate her the way the former Organization leader did.

But Xemnas didn't have his beloved Kingdom Hearts to moon over, so he had to come up with something else to do. After deciding against acting out Star Wars scenes and creating a new pie recipe, he eventually called for Saïx and Xigbar.

"Yes, Superior?" Saïx greeted, still used to his days in the previous Organization XIII. As much as he could recall them – Xehanort's heart-transplant-slash-brainwashing had left him rather emptier than he had been before, of both feelings and memories.

"Yo, Xem." Xigbar threw out a smirk and a mocking salute. "Whaddaya want now?"

"I am bored," Xemnas announced. Saïx stared at him blankly, and Xigbar snorted.

"We don't have to cater to your every whim, ex-Bossman. Whaddaya want us to do, sing show tunes?"

Saïx remained silent, trying to remember if he could sing. He thought he used to be talented at it, once.

"I hoped you might provide an alternative to sitting and waiting for Sora to Drop," Xemnas said.

"Hmm. Well, I'll admit I'm kinda bored, too." Xigbar sat cross-legged on the ground. "You got any ideas, Moony?"

"No," Saïx almost-whispered. Xigbar snorted.

"You were pretty boring back in the old-Org, but now you're a total zombie. Just like Kiddo used to be," Xigbar reminisced. "I almost miss our old comrades. At least they was interesting. Feels like I'm the only one who can be Xehanortified and not turn into a stick-in-the-mud – no offense, Xemmy."

"None taken," Xemnas muttered. "I also am not entirely satisfied with these new arrangements."

"No choice," Saïx said in a monotone, lowering his head so his hair fell in his face. "No choice at all."

"The old coot can do whatever he wants with us now that we're him." Xigbar sighed. "Frankly I'm surprised we can talk like this about him."

Xemnas and Saïx nodded. "And that Impetus–"

Xigbar snorted. "More like "Imp". Arrogant punk."

"Yes. He's even worse than Master Xehanort," Xemnas replied.

"Acting all high-and-mighty just 'cause he got to time-travel and set this whole scheme in motion. He's worse than Flower Power was."

Saïx remained silent, tracing cracks in the ground with one finger. What was the use in complaining? It was pointless. Useless. Master Xehanort had broken his will, all thanks to his ignorant plan to gain power in the former Organization, a plan taken too far. He should've listened to Axel – was he Lea now? Saïx hoped so – when he had the chance. Axel would know what to do now.

"Yo, Moony! Did someone drown _your _goldfish?" Xigbar asked, seeing the forlorn expression on Saïx's face.

He shook his head slowly.

"Saïx, are you in despair over the loss of Kingdom Hearts as well?" Xemnas asked, since he himself was still mourning for the loss of his beloved, though in less public situations.

Saïx shook his head again. "I suppose I am in despair over the loss of… myself."

"Wow. Way to lay on the angst-sauce, Moony." Xigbar smirked, opened a corridor, and stuck his hand through it, pulling out three bars of blue ice cream.

"What…?"

"Heh, bring back any memories? I know Flamsilocks would always share these with his midgets. What about you?"

Saïx stared at the ice cream, practically eating it with his eyes. "…Long ago."

"A long, long, time ago, in a galaxy far away–"

Xigbar and Saïx stared at Xemnas, Saïx blank as ever and Xigbar trying not to laugh at their former boss' singing of "The Saga Begins".

"I apologize," Xemnas muttered.

Xigbar laughed. "Well, Moony, have some nostalgia, my treat. And one for you too, ex-Bossman, to help you get through the loss of your beloved."

"Your sympathy is appreciated," Xemnas said, accepting the blue dairy treat without picking up on Xigbar's sarcasm. Saïx took his as well, holding the stick reverently.

His first bite brought a nostalgic smile to his face. Xigbar clapped him and Xemnas on their backs, almost dripping his own ice cream on Saïx's coat.

"We can still make this new Organization work, right?"

At that exact moment Sora dropped back into the battlefield. Xemnas stared at him in alarm.

"Uh…" the silverette was uncharacteristically lost for words.

"Want some ice cream?" Xigbar asked with a crooked grin. Sora, who also had Roxas and Xion inside of him, couldn't say no to ice cream.

And so three villains and a hero ate sea-salt ice cream before Saïx and Xigbar left and Sora and Xemnas resumed their boss battle.

**A/N: That… did so not turn out like I expected. XD XD XD I have to admit I had fun with the odd Xemnas/Saïx/Xigbar friendship, even though I don't like Xemnas/Saïx friendship (or any other ship) at all in canon. Xemnas/KH shows up in pretty much every fic I write Xemnas in. xP Crackfiction FTW.**


	6. Vanitas's Revenge

**A/N: Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed! I didn't expect such a short little drabble series to get so many reviews already… 8'D You guys are awesome, seriously.**

**Oh, and these drabbles aren't necessarily in chronological order.**

Sora was wandering around Castle Lampshade in search of Kairi when two things happened: his Bonus Time alarm blared from the nonexistent speakers, and Ven pounced on him. The brunette was literally knocked onto the clean-carpeted floor and summoned his keyblade in surprise.

"Ven?" He banished the Kingdom Key. "Doesn't Aqua get mad when you run in the halls?"

"Well… yeah." He rubbed his head sheepishly, springing off of Sora. "But Vani's after me because I killed some of his Prize Pods to make ice cream!"

"Can I help?" Sora asked. He could hear Ven's dark half storming down the hallway behind them.

"But you're about to Drop…" Ven's face lit up with an idea. "You can stall Vani until you Drop! Then you'll disappear, and he won't be able to hurt you, and I'll have time to run away!"

"That's a great idea!" Sora agreed. "But wait, he can't hurt you anyway, can he? There's the truce."

"We're not allowed to _kill _each other. Or give anyone scars," Ven added. "But we can still have Boss Battles like at the last castle."

"Oh." Sora didn't particularly want any more Boss Battles; he'd have to go back to one when he Dropped in a few minutes. "Hurry up and run, Vani's coming!"

"Thanks, Sora!" Ven called, sprinting off down the hall and barely rounding the corner before Vanitas charged through, roaring threats at his light half.

"Hey, Vani!" Sora had to yell to be heard over Vanitas's threats. The annoyingly cheerful greeting stopped him for a moment.

"I _told _you never to call me that!" He spat, summoning Void Gear.

_That's a scary keyblade, _Sora thought. "What're you doing?" Sora asked, ignoring Vanitas's anger.

"I'm going to chop off all of _Ventus's_ precious hair. And I don't have anything against chopping off yours if you don't get your idiot self out of my way." He took up his battle stance, and Sora stepped back.

_I'm going to drop in ten seconds… He's not gonna be able to give me a haircut like he did to Riku… _Sora shuddered at the thought of how awfully Vanitas had cut Riku's hair after he accidentally used the black-haired teen's special hair gel. It still hadn't completely grown back before _Dream Drop Distance_ started, and now the silverette had to deal with hordes of angry fangirls bemoaning the loss of his silky locks.

Suddenly there was silence. No blaring alarms. Just Vanitas's angry gold glare and growing smirk.

"Looks like I've got more time to punish you than I thought." The smirk morphed into an all-out evil grin, and Vanitas charged.

"Riku, did you have to use a Drop-Me-Not _now!?" _Sora yelled as he fled down the hallway from a rampaging Vanitas.

XXX

When Sora finally dropped back into his Boss Battle with Wargoyle, his clothes were extremely disheveled with many rips and gashes in them, but his spikes of hair were completely intact.

**A/N: Another short one. ^^ Ven and Sora annoy Vanitas by calling him Vani a lot.**


	7. Cutscene Marathon

**A/N: A huge thanks again to everyone who's been reading and reviewing this! :D A lot of people wanted to see something from Riku's POV, and I plan on doing that as soon as I get a really good idea for it. In the meantime, this is partially from Riku's POV, but mostly Sora's.**

"Huh?" Riku looked at the Drop Gauge floating off to the bottom-right of his vision, surprised to see that it had suddenly filled back up. It had been over half-empty moments ago; how did that happen?

He looked around as if the culprit would show himself. He was in the Golden Wood in the Symphony of Sorcery, and the only living creatures he could see were his two Dream Eaters, Derpy the Pegaslick (Sora created that one) and Twilight the Electricorn (also Sora's doing). Derpy accidentally did… well, derpy things sometimes, but Riku doubted she could accidentally fill his Drop Gauge.

Riku shrugged and went into the Snowgleam Wood to look for treasure chests. It wasn't like he could do anything until Sora finished the Symphony of Sorcery too, after all.

~Sometime Previously~

"Sora! Sora! Look what I found!"

Demyx came running into the Fourth-Wall Window, as everyone called the room where they could watch the in-game events take place, and was about to plop down on one of the beanbags next to Sora before Vanitas growled at him. Demyx squeaked and ran to Sora's other side.

"Demyx?" Sora asked. "What is it?"

The Nocturne dropped his armful of purple bottles into Sora's lap. "I found these in the basement! You said you keep spending too much munny on them, right?"

"Huh?" Sora held up one of the bottles, which contained a Drop-Me-Not. "You found these here?"

"In the _basement?" _Roxas asked from the third occupied beanbag (the residents of Castle Lampshade had decided they needed more beanbags in the Fourth-Wall Window, since so many characters hung out there). "I didn't know we had a basement. Is it anything like the one at the Castle That Never Was?"

Demyx nodded, shuddering. "I only went down there 'cause I was playing hide-and-seek with Xion and Ven, and I was about to run back out when I found these." He pointed to the Drop-Me-Nots.

"What else is down there?" Vanitas asked.

"Oh, some board games, a Twister mat, spare coats, tons of free keyblades-"

"They really are giving them out to everyone now," Roxas commented.

"-Larxene's blackmail, some of Vexen's failed experiments, Void-stuffed pillows… Yeah," Demyx said. Sora, Roxas, and Vanitas got the point.

"So, about those Drop-Me-Nots," Sora said, "do you think they'll work here?"

Demyx shrugged. "How should I know?"

Sora shrugged back, then uncorked one, figuring the only way to find out was to try. He didn't particularly want to go back to his battle with Spellican, anyway – that awful Dream Eater-creating Dream Eater had killed him nearly ten times already. "Here goes nothing."

Sora gulped it down, then let his gaze unfocus so he could see the Drop Gauge in the bottom-right corner of his vision. It had completely emptied, while Riku's on the screen had completely filled.

"Cool!" Sora yelled, fist-pumping the air. "Hey, since I have plenty of time now, who wants to marathon all the cutscenes from _Birth by Sleep_ to _Kingdom Hearts II_?"

Vanitas and Roxas shrugged, and Demyx whooped. They found Aqua to help them set up the screens for the several-movie-length feature, and by that time several other characters, including Xion, Ven, Terra, Naminé, Hayner, Pence, Olette, and Kairi (who Sora had finally found a few days previously), had gathered and brought pillows (not the Void-stuffed ones) to sit on. Xion popped the popcorn with some Fire magic, and Roxas dimmed the lights.

Everyone quieted when the PlanitB remix of "Simple and Clean" began to play at the opening of _Birth by Sleep._

~Several Hours Later~

Riku's Drop Gauge still wouldn't empty, and the Drop button on the menu failed every time he tried to select it. After several hours, he gave up trying to fix it and took a nap, hoping that eventually Sora would complete The Symphony of Sorcery so they could finish their Mark of Mastery Exam.

**A/N: Poor Riku. XD**

**Drop-Me-Nots are purple because I felt like it. The Basement references are from some of my other fics. As for the Dream Eater's names… If you get the references, you win internet ice cream. XD**


	8. Soup Juice

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait with this chapter, but I haven't forgotten about this fic! Even though it's still called Drop-Me-Not, I'm not going to use the Drop Gauge as a plot device in every chapter since I wanted to have some fun playing with other characters. This one does use the Drop Gauge, though.**

Sora had _finally _managed to find Kairi in Castle Lampshade. He knew it was a big castle, but seriously, the fact that it taken him over a week was ridiculous. Now that he finally had some downtime while Riku was fighting his way through The Country of the Musketeers, Sora mustered his courage and approached Kairi while she was playing Go Fish (technically Go Nobody) with Demyx, Luxord, Hayner, and Naminé.

"Hey Kairi, can I, uh, talk to you?" He put his hands behind his head, trying not to look nervous.

"Sure," she replied curiously. Demyx snickered as she set down her hand face-down. Naminé tried not to laugh as Hayner used Demyx's distraction to sneak a look at his hand.

"This will mix up the odds…" Luxord muttered, though he sounded amused.

"Demyx, got any Snipers?" Hayner grinned.

"Aw, man!"

Sora ignored them and led Kairi out of the game room to the hallway. "Uh, do you want to eat dinner tonight…? You know, uh, with me?"

Kairi grinned and flicked one of his spikes of hair. "Of course, you doof. Just be sure you're here."

"Huh?"

"Well, we can't eat together if you're on the other side of the Fourth Wall."

"Oh. Yeah." He'd have to time his Drops better today. "Don't worry about it, I'll be here."

"So..." Kairi clasped her hands behind her back. "Does this count as a date?"

Sora blushed. "Do you want it to?"

"Um… maybe…" Kairi said shyly.

Giving her a quick, light hug, Sora replied, "Then it's a date."

XXX

Naturally, he was late. He half-expected the White Rabbit to run up and beat him up with his giant watch for being "late for a very important date." Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, the only beating Sora suffered was the mental beating he gave himself.

"Sorry, Kairi- all these Dream Eaters kept ambushing me, and those Aura Lions are hard-" He gasped for breath, having run up five flights of stairs to reach the dining hall. _Wish I'd remembered to use Flowmotion, I could've gotten here in no time._

"At least you're here now." Kairi smiled, standing at the end of the long rectangular table.

"Sorry…" Sora couldn't help saying again.

"Really, it's fine." She was probably just trying to be polite, but he appreciated it.

He remembered to be gentlemanly and pull out her chair, at least, though he almost fell over when he sat down himself. Most of the other residents of Castle Lampshade had already eaten dinner, but there were a few people still lingering in the dining hall. Larxene was arguing with Xaldin – or was it Dilan now? Sora wasn't sure – that her steak was too rare, which was kind of ruining the more peaceful mood Sora would've liked. Demyx's smacking from farther down the table wasn't helping much, either.

Sora was known to talk anyone's ears off, but now that he was alone with Kairi… If they hadn't specifically called it a date he probably would've been fine, but now he felt clueless. They were best friends; he shouldn't be this lost for words. But what was he supposed to talk about on a date? Was it different from what they'd talk about if they were just eating as friends?

_Maybe this was a dumb idea, _Sora thought, sitting across the table from her. _I could've got Roxas and Xion or anyone to come with us too, why didn't I think of that? _Kairi was being too quiet. It was awkward, but then again, she probably felt the same way from his silence.

"So… uh… you look pretty," he said the first thing he could think of. She wore her standard pink dress from _Kingdom Hearts II_, since her old _Kingdom Hearts _clothes didn't fit anymore and she didn't like wearing her school uniform around the castle, and there weren't really any other options to choose from. At least Sora had his KHII and _Dream Drop Distance _outfits to choose from now. They were still all better off than Naminé, for example, who only had her short white dress.

"Thanks." Kairi smiled. "You look…" She couldn't help laughing. "Well, you look good for having just fought off some Aura Lions."

Sora grinned lopsidedly, ruffling his already-ruffled-hair. "Good thing you look nice enough for both of us." He wasn't saying it just to make conversation this time; she really did look great, even in the same clothes she always wore. Her hair was brushed perfectly smooth and conditioned to where it looked almost as silky and shiny as Riku's did before his haircut.

After they'd broken the ice, they had no trouble finding things to talk about. Kairi wanted to know all about his adventures on the other side of the Fourth Wall, and Sora could ramble on endlessly.

"…Notre Dame's _really _huge, like, almost as big as this castle, and when I jumped off it took me like a whole ten seconds to reach the ground…"

"...Donald and Goofy didn't remember me, but we're still friends…"

"…and then I blew up the evil giraffe-Dream Eaters with balloons…"

If Sora was boring Kairi with all of his adventure stories, she didn't show it. Or he was just that oblivious, which wouldn't be surprising. By the time he'd pretty much summed up his whole adventure so far, Zexion-no-wait-Ienzo finally came to "take their orders."

"The dining hall's supposed to be closed by now. What do you want?" He asked, sounding at least a little irritated. Wasn't he supposed to be nice now that he was a somebody?

"Uh…" Sora realized he'd been talking so much he forgot to decide what to eat.

"How about the shrimp soup?" Kairi suggested. "Like we used to have on the Islands."

"Yeah, that sounds good." Sora smiled.

Ienzo muttered something like "That's not even on the menu," but he wrote it down in his Lexicon anyway.

"I'm sorry I was so late," Sora said again. Kairi tried not to sigh.

"Really, Sora, it's fine."

"But Ienzo-"

"Won't die from making us a few bowls of soup. I'll make it up to him if I have to; I'm on cooking duty tomorrow. Besides, it's nice that there isn't anyone else here now."

Demyx and Larxene had left, and the candles on the table were now magically lit and casting a soft, romantic light. Sora squirmed in his chair, feeling nervous and uncomfortable again, but this time Kairi saved him by talking about the things she'd been doing at the castle while Sora was out adventuring.

"…The pool's really nice here. It's not as big as the ocean, of course, but I don't get salt in my eyes…"

"…Xion's been keyblade-sparring with me, but I'm still not very good…"

"…and Terra and Vanitas have a scoreboard in the game room, but I don't know what it's for. Terra's winning…"

Sora enjoyed just listening to her, occasionally asking questions or commenting on weird stuff, like when Kairi told him about the time Roxas almost blew up the kitchen when he found out they were out of sea-salt ice cream.

"I like ice cream too, but isn't that a little overkill?" Sora would know; he'd practically invented overkill.

"Well, it's this tradition he and Xion have…" Sora wondered why he hadn't heard of this tradition before. Maybe that was why Riku gave him that ice cream bar back in _Kingdom Hearts II…_

Ienzo came back and dropped off their shrimp soup with a grumbled "enjoy." Sora had to remind himself to use his manners and not slurp it like a Hun or Hyena or other uncivilized group-and-or-creature he'd seen in his adventures. He still managed to spill some, though, which made Kairi giggle and his ears turn red.

"There's too much soup-juice," Sora muttered, wiping up the small puddle with his napkin. Kairi started giggling more. "What?"

"S-Soup juice!" She started laughing uncontrollably.

"What? There's too much of it!" Sora couldn't understand what was so funny. She couldn't be making fun of him; she wouldn't do that. But what had he done?

"It's called broth," she said once she managed to control her laughter. "Just the way you said that, all serious…" She couldn't help giggling again.

"Oh." Sora's face heated up. "Well, there's too much broth then."

"I kind of like soup-juice better," Kairi mused with a grin, sipping some of the liquid from her spoon, looking just like the Princess she was. Sora spooned some into his mouth, too, trying to avoid embarrassing himself even more.

This wasn't going like he imagined. It wasn't bad, just being with her at all was good enough for him, but he wished he could just… _Be more like Riku, _he thought. _Riku would be all cool and not-messy and not have any problem with stuff like this._

That wasn't completely true, but Sora didn't know that.

"So… uh… Do you like this?" Sora asked, watching her hair glow in the candlelight.

"Of course I do," Kairi answered. "Don't you know… nevermind." It looked like she was blushing, but it might've just been the reddish glow of the fire.

"Don't I know what?" He didn't have a clue what she was talking about. Had he been oblivious to something important?

"I… said nevermind." She lost her nerve again.

"C'mon, Kairi, why won't you tell me?" Sora unconsciously used his power of Puppy Eyes on her, and she fidgeted with her spoon.

"I always like being with you," she said quietly.

"Even when I make a mess with my soup-juice?" Sora asked.

Kairi stifled a giggle. "Yes, Sora." She rested her arm on the table, close enough to where Sora could… If he had enough courage…

_C'mon, _he thought to himself, _I saved the worlds twice. I'll be a Keyblade Master soon. I've gotta be strong enough to tell Kairi how I feel._ He reached over and took her hand.

"I like being with you too," he said. She turned as pink as her dress but didn't reply. _What do I do now? _She was just staring at him… her eyes were really pretty, glowing a soft violet… but she wasn't looking at his eyes. She was looking more towards… his lips?

Did she want him to kiss her? The moment seemed as good as it was going to get. Face probably as pink as hers, Sora leaned across the table…

And knocked over his forgotten bowl of soup, spilling it all over himself.

Kairi's eyes widened. "Sora, are you okay?"

Embarrassment colored him bright red. "Yeah," he lied. "Stupid soup-juice."

She smiled sympathetically walked around to his side of the table to soak up some of the liquid on his chest with her napkin. Then she took a step back and looked away. "Um…"

"Thanks." Sora smiled, not realizing that she looked nervous because of their closeness. "Sorry for being such a klutz. I forgot that bowl was there."

"Were you going to…?" Kairi tried to ask.

"Um…" She wouldn't want to kiss him now. He was covered in soup-juice, and the embarrassment had made him lose his nerve. But if he didn't now, when would he get the chance? "If… you wanted to…"

"But did you want to…?"

"Uh…" _Just say yes, _he told himself. "…Kinda."

"Then… I kind of did too…"

Ventus, who had been "accidentally" eavesdropping on his way to get a snack, stuck his head in the door. "Just kiss her already!" Which made Sora and Kairi both turn a fiery shade of red. But he knew Ven would tease him forever if he backed down now.

So he held Kairi's hand and leaned close to her face…

And was swept over with a wave of dizziness, finding himself back in a battle with a group of Aura Lions.

XXX

Riku wasn't prepared to be pounced on by a furious Kairi only moments after he Dropped.

"RIKU!" She shrieked, knocking him to the lobby floor and holding her fist up like she was going to punch him. Riku had never seen her this angry before, ever. Had she swapped consciousness with Vanitas or something?

He was too startled to say anything other than "What?"

She punched him. It was only on the shoulder, and it didn't hurt at all, but _what was going on?_

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" She demanded.

"I finished the Country of the Musketeers, so I Dropped. Why?"

Kairi took a deep breath, raising her fist again, but she lowered it by using all of her self-control. "You had to Drop _now?"_

"Yeah. Sora needs to get off his lazy bum and finish the world so we can keep going-"

"We were _on a date, _Riku!" She shrieked and nearly punched him again. Maybe that "lazy bum" comment wasn't a good idea at that particular moment.

"…Oh."

**A/N: This may not be the best chapter… I started with the idea of Kairi raging on Riku for interrupting her date with Sora and worked backwards. I'm not a big fan of Sora/Kairi romance; I prefer them to be platonic, but it was a tempting plot device. ^^;;**

**Terra and Vanitas are keeping score of nice things they've done to try and win over Aqua, by the way. XD Maybe I'll have a chapter about that sometime.**

**Some people requested more stuff with Xemnas and co. and I got a good idea for that, so that'll be next!**


	9. Together for Christmas

**A/N: I know, I know, I said I was going to do more with the new Org in this chapter. But I have been a bad lazy procrastinator, and I wanted to do something special for Christmas, so that will be pushed to the **_**next **_**chapter. Don't worry, I still have fun writing this. C:**

Sora didn't know who rigged the Drop Gauge, or how. And frankly, when he saw Riku confused and dazed in the lobby of Castle Lampshade, he was too happy to care.

"RIKU!" He yelled, glomping his best friend back to the floor that he had just managed to stand up from.

"Wha-?"

"RIKU RIKU YOU'RE ALIVE I CAN SEE YOU AGAIN THIS IS GREAT I DIDN'T THINK I'D GET TO SEE YOU THIS YEAR BUT HERE YOU ARE YOU'RE-" As he gasped in a huge breath, Kairi came down the stairs, eyes shining, her grin almost as huge as Sora's.

"Riku!" She didn't think twice about joining their floor-hug, but then she pulled back skeptically. "Wait, it's really you, right? Not Repliku playing dress-up?"

Riku just made some choking sounds, since Sora was still restricting his lung capacity.

"Sora, let go." Kairi smacked him playfully.

"Hehe, sorry, Riku." Sora grinned and let him go, and the silver-haired teen sucked in an even larger breath than his friend had earlier.

"Yes, it's me." He coughed and stood up, brushing off his clothes.

"Aren't you happy to see us?" Sora asked pitifully, looking like a kicked puppy. Riku grinned and punched him lightly on the shoulder.

"Of course I am. But can you do me a favor and not try to kill me next time you see me?"

"Riku," Kairi said in a 'you-two-are-such-doofs' way.

"Hey, Kairi." Riku smiled and gave her a proper hug, not like the dogpile-glomp-fail earlier. It hadn't been too long since they'd last seen each other, but considering that last time she'd… well, she'd punched him. Not that it hurt; but it was kind of awkward between them for a little while since he'd kind of accidentally ruined her first almost-kiss. And they both doubted Sora would get up the nerve to try again.

But Kairi was a forgiving person, and they were all somehow together, and it was Christmas Eve. So he gave her a hug and filed a mental note to apologize better later.

"This is awesome!" Sora said, bouncing up and down, as hyper as if he'd eaten all the Christmas cookies in the castle (which he couldn't, because Demyx and Ven beat him to it, and Vanitas hoarded several trays away for himself). "We all get to have Christmas together! I didn't think we'd get to this year!"

"But how did you get here, Riku? Without Sora having to leave?" Kairi asked. The silverette shrugged.

"Beats me. Someone might've messed with the programming."

"Could've been Data-Sora or Data-Riku," Kairi mused, then smiled. "It doesn't matter. I'm just glad we get to spend Christmas together, all three of us."

"C'mon, guys!" Sora grabbed their hands and pulled them towards the stairs. "We've gotta celebrate!"

"Sora, we don't have to rush…" Riku said in vain, still being dragged up the stairs. He rolled his eyes in exasperated affection, a look that Kairi shared. "Why couldn't you be this enthusiastic when we were working on the raft?"

"It's Christmas!" Sora replied. There wasn't any better explanation than that.

XXX

Nobody had any clue why Aqua put Vanitas in charge of Christmas decorating. Maybe it was because he needed some extra holiday spirit, or maybe it was just because he could summon and destroy his Unversed for an unlimited supply of shiny, decorative objects. Whatever the reason, he was supposedly in charge, so he was the one Sora, Riku, and Kairi complained to.

"You mean there's _no Christmas tree?" _Sora's jaw hung gaping open.

"Tree?" Vanitas looked genuinely confused. "Why in the name of darkness would we have a tree inside?"

"Because it's _Christmas," _Sora said, dragging the word out like molasses.

"So?" Vanitas stared.

"So we have a Christmas tree."

"_Birth by Sleep_ was released January ninth of 2010," Riku said. "Didn't you have Christmas with us last year?"

"Look, idiots, I wasn't created knowing this stuff, and I was banished last year from Thanksgiving until January."

"Oh, I remember that now…" Kairi frowned. "You made Floods pop out of the turkey, and then you ran off with most of the food while we were distracted."

Vanitas chuckled. "Good times, good times."

"So you don't know what Christmas is," Riku surmised.

"Whatever it is, it sounds stupid. Only idiots would bring a tree inside."

Kairi ignored his insult. "But Aqua put you in charge of Christmas decorations."

"She did?" Vanitas blinked in honest confusion. "Must've been distracted…"

Riku snorted.

"So it's Christmas Eve, and we don't have _any _decorations?" Sora said desperately.

"Nope." The black-haired teen yawned. "I'm going to bed."

Without another word, he left through a dark corridor. Riku sighed. "Some help _he _is…" He thought Aqua would've known better than to give him a task like that.

"It'll be okay!" Sora grinned optimistically. "We can still put up decorations for Christmas!"

Kairi's brow furrowed. "We don't have a lot of time…" seeing Sora's falling expression, she added, "but I'm sure we can still throw something together."

"We'll need everyone's help," Riku said. "Get on the intercom and make an announcement. I'll look in the Basement for..."

"Whatever we have in the Basement," Kairi finished, and he nodded.

Sora pumped a fist in the air. "Let's do this!"

XXX

Riku should've thought a little harder before volunteering to search the Basement, for several reasons.

First of all, it was The Basement That Doesn't Want to Be, or at least Castle Lampshade's version of it, which was just as terrifying as the previous Basement in Castle Nemo.

Second, the labyrinthine shelves were nearly endless, sprawling beneath the whole Castle, and would require more than one person to search adequately.

Third, and most importantly, Riku was… kind of… almost… scared of the dark.

"Scared" wasn't really the right word. He had a strong dislike of it, after having Ansem-I-Mean-Xemnas-I-Mean-Xehanort-I-Mean-Nobody-Actually-Cares-At-This-Point leeching darkness into his heart, and then being stuck in the Realm of Darkness for a while, and then having to wear a blindfold for almost a year. Basically, darkness evoked strong and unpleasant feelings in him. And the Basement was practically a breeding ground for darkness. If there weren't such strong enchantments on the Castle, Riku suspected it would be teeming with Heartless.

But in the moment he had ignorantly volunteered, and he wasn't about to turn back like a sissy. He cast Firaga at an old pillow, stabbed it onto a large stick, and used it as a torch.

"See, not so bad now. At least I can see." He actually needed his sight down here, where he couldn't navigate with his nose or ears. Everything smelled damp, rotten, and generally like the color brown, and the cramped shelving packed with junk muffled most sound.

He wasn't even sure what he was looking for, but he wandered through the aisles. Unversed popped up now and then, the only monsters that were allowed inside Castle Lampshade (because Vanitas insisted on it, and everyone would rather have Vanitas and his endless supply of minions on their side than on Xehanort's). They weren't difficult to destroy, but they were annoying, and Riku hated how he panicked and almost shrieked whenever one caught him off guard. Especially when that one was a Hareraiser, which was essentially just a bunny. A rather demonic-looking bunny, but still. A bunny.

"Twister mats… Organization coats… spare keyblades?" Well, they had to come from somewhere, he supposed. "Void… extra Void… supersaturated Void…" Didn't Xemnas keep all of that at his own castle? "Sea-salt ice cream… squash juice?" Riku picked up a can off of the shelf. "Zero percent alcohol, one percent juice?" he read aloud. "What's the rest made of?"

"Void," another voice replied with a hysterical cackle. Riku jumped and flung the can at the voice. "Ow! Ow, that was my face… I like my face…"

"Who are you?" Riku couldn't see him; he was too far from the pillow-torch's glow.

"Who am I?" Another insane laugh. "Aww, you don't remember me? Well, I guess we never _really _met…"

Wait… the voice was awfully familiar… "Repliku?" Or was it Data-Riku? Man, now he knew how Sora felt, all those different versions of himself running around…

"Nope!" The voice's owner skipped into the firelight. He looked exactly like Repliku, except his suit was a vibrant shade of magenta splashed with chartreuse. Riku was glad the light was dim; if it was any brighter the clashing colors might've made his eyes bleed. "My name's R-2! Second Riku replica, blah blah blah, guardian of the Basement That Doesn't Want to Be." He bowed extravagantly.

"Uh…" Riku blinked. "There's another one?"

R-2 pouted. "_Another one? _That's really rude. _Vexen _couldn't make the first replica perfect, nope. He made R-1 and me and R-3 was his poster child. His 'first success' he said." He crossed his arms. "I'm _perfectly _successful. I'm smart and stuff and I catalogued everything in this whole basement!"

Riku was still rather confused, but considering the waning amount of time he had left to find Christmas decorations, he asked, "so can you help me find something?"

"Of course I can!" R-2 grinned. "I'd be happy to help you! Even if you're the real Riku. I mean, you must be a nice person, probably, I mean you didn't mean for _Vexen _to clone you or anything-"

Riku cleared his throat. "Yeah. Right. Do you know where the Christmas decorations are?"

"CHRISTMAS!" R-2 bounced up and down with a hyperness level equivatlent to Sora's. "I _love _Christmas! Even though I never actually really celebrated it. Yet. But Xen-Xen told me some stuff and it sounds fun! Follow me!"

R-2 dashed down the aisle, skipping and/or cartwheeling every few steps, so quickly that Riku had to sprint to keep him within the glow of his torch. He got so turned around and lost that he wasn't sure he'd be able to find his way back to the entrance, so hopefully R-2 would be able to lead him back, too.

"Here we are!" R-2 leapt up to one of the higher shelves and tossed down a large plastic tub that Riku barely managed to catch. "Christmas! Lots of Christmas stuff! It says it right here on the label."

"Uh, thanks. Can you help me get out now?"

"Sure!"

Just as quickly, they sprinted back to the steps leading back into the light. Riku hardly had time to blink before they were there.

"Thanks," he said curtly, hoping the replica wasn't following him up the steps. He was.

"What's your castle like? Is it like the Castle That Never Was? The Basement's the same. Can I come up and look? Do you have any Christmas food?"

Riku glanced back and forth, as if expecting someone else to take care of him. Surprisingly, a portal opened, and a girl in an Organization coat with short brown hair stepped out.

"R-2!" She called, running over to hug him. "What are you doing here? I've been worried sick!"

"Nobodies can't worry," he recited like he'd said it several times before but didn't quite believe it.

"You've been listening to Axel too much again," she fussed, smoothing his ruffled hair.

"Who are you?" Riku asked. As far as he knew, the Organization didn't have a member who fit this description.

"I'm-" She turned on him. "Wait, who are-? Oh." She took a step back, pulling R-2 with her. "You must be- but I thought- the imposter-?"

"I found another universe," R-2 told her excitedly.

"I thought you said you were the Guardian of the Basement That Doesn't Want to Be." Riku narrowed his eyes skeptically.

"I am. In my universe. When Xen-Xen and Dem-Dem have to leave me all alone and I'm bored."

The girl stared at him and sighed. "I'm not even going to ask this time... Let's go home to _our _universe and forget about all this insane stuff… Hope he didn't mess anything up for you," she said to Riku, who shrugged.

"Nah. He helped me out, actually."

She smiled and opened another corridor. "That was nice of you, R-2."

"Are you proud of me, Xen-Xen?"

"Yes." She laughed. "Yes I am."

Then they left, and Riku remembered that Sora and Kairi were waiting for him.

XXX

"Hah!" Sora yelled triumphantly. "We did it!"

Kairi giggled, shaking her head. "All you did was press one button."

"Yeah, but it worked."

They had finally figured out how to talk over the intercom to everyone in the Castle when Riku came back with the heavy box of decorations. The Castle's residents were already gathering, and Riku had to push his way through, accidentally stepping on Larxene's toes and almost getting a nasty shock. Xion quickly deflected it with her keyblade, and Riku gave her a quick smile of thanks.

With a grunt he set the tub on the table next to the intercom system. "Hopefully everything's in here."

"That?" Kairi scrutinized it. "It's kind of small…"

"It's heavy enough to make up for it, trust me."

"Great!" Sora cheered, not worried in the slightest. "So when everyone's here, we can get started!"

Aqua pushed through the crowd towards them, a concerned look on her face. "Did your announcement say that nobody's decorated yet?"

"Yup," Sora replied.

"But Vanitas said he was finished-"

Riku interrupted, having a good mental image of what probably happened. "Did he just nod and agree with you when you asked him how everything was going?"

"Well, yes-"

"And he never gave you any proof?"

"I trusted that he'd-"

"While staring at you blankly?"

"Um, maybe-?"

Riku sighed and facepalmed. "Then he has a large dose of Sora in him, and he wasn't listening to a word you said."

Aqua groaned and rested her head in her hands. "I was going to supervise him… I thought he might need help, but… well, I didn't have time. Running a Castle is harder than it looks."

"I'm sure it is," Riku agreed.

"I haven't even been out of this room in two weeks, except for today."

"Really?" Sora asked. "Did you eat or anything?"

"When Terra or Ven brought me something. My room's connected-" she pointed to a door underneath one of the large screens, which was blank for the first time since they had moved to Castle Lampshade, "-so I slept in there or on one of the bean bags."

"I'm sorry, Aqua," Kairi said sympathetically. The blue-haired master shook her head.

"Don't worry, I'm fine. I can rest later; we have a Castle to decorate."

"Yeah!" Sora clapped his hands and pushed a button on the intercom system, which turned on the microphone. "Is everyone ready for Christmas?"

"YEAH!" Was most of the residents' reply. Demyx's was more of an excited squeal, Larxene examined her nails absently, and Luxord shuffled his cards. Xion, Roxas, and Ven jumped up and down like the little kids they were on the inside.

"Then everyone line up for your assignments," Aqua said, taking over the microphone. The reply this time was much less enthusiastic.

"Aww, that means work, doesn't it?" Demyx asked.

"Yeah, man," Hayner replied with a bummed sigh.

Xion flicked them both lightly. Well, not quite as lightly as she meant to; Roxas and Axel had a higher pain tolerance than Demyx and Hayner. "Cheer up, it'll be fun. It's not like missions back in the Organization."

"I still don't know what the whole 'Organization' thing was about…" Hayner muttered.

The characters kind of lined up, but it was still more like an elongated blob. Aqua sighed. "They don't listen very well…"

"Nope," Riku agreed. "But at least they're listening at all. What do you want us to do?"

"Make a list of all the supplies we have to work with out of that box, and make another list of everything we need," she said with the authoritative voice that had earned her the position of Castle Lampshade's leader.

Sora saluted, Kairi giggled, and Riku started working. He opened the tub, and…

_It's empty? _No, that wasn't it. It was more like there was a bottomless pit inside it, if that made any sense. He reached in and pulled out a long string of lights.

"Those weren't in there earlier, were they?" Kairi asked.

"Nothing was in there earlier. There still isn't; take a look."

She did. Still gaping emptiness, or Void, or whatever it was. "Weird."

He shrugged. "I've seen weirder."

"Will you start handing out supplies?" Aqua asked Kairi, and she agreed.

Riku pulled out decorations after decorations until there were enough for all of the characters to spread Christmas cheer throughout the Castle. The last thing he pulled out, though, was heavy – so heavy that he needed Terra's help. With a deep, manly grunt, they together pulled out a ten-foot-tall Christmas tree.

"That… defies logic in so many ways," Riku said, but he didn't question it. He and Terra left to set up the Christmas tree in the Common Room.

XXX

"Wow," Kairi breathed.

"Double wow," Sora seconded.

Riku smiled. "We did a good job, didn't we."

At the end of the day, they lied under the Christmas tree, their faces tinted rainbow in the glow of its multicolored lights. The keyblade wielders' keychains, Way to Dawn and Kingdom Key and Destiny's Embrace and Oathkeeper and Oblivion and Wayward Wind and Rainfell and Earthshaker, decorated it in place of ornaments. A fire burned in the hearth to their left, over which a long, long row of stockings hung. Sora, Riku, and Kairi's were cramped together in the corner, close as their bond of friendship.

"Yeah, we did," Sora agreed with a large yawn.

"Tired already?" Kairi teased, "Lazy bum."

"Hey!" He tried to brush her away, but another yawn caught him by surprise. Riku laughed.

"We might as well go to bed. You two are still young enough for Santa, right?"

"And you're not?" Kairi crossed her arms.

"I met Santa!" Sora said defensively. "And besides, if you're too old, you just won't get any presents, hah."

"You're such a kid." Riku leaned over Kairi to shove him, then smiled. "That's not always a bad thing."

"Huh?"

Riku lied back down on his sleeping bag, hands behind his head.

"Hey, you're not going to sleep yet, are you?" Kairi asked, lying on her stomach and propping herself up with her elbows. "You still have the record for the longest time awake on Christmas Eve."

"And I plan on keeping that." Riku jerked a thumb at Sora, whose eyelids were already drooping. "It's not like I have any competition."

"Hey," Sora replied groggily. "I'm… gonna do it this year, just watch…"

"Yeah, right." Riku grinned. A few moments later, as predicted, Sora was snoring loud enough to wake any characters in the adjacent rooms. Aside from that, the night was peaceful, and they were cozy and warm.

Kairi sighed contentedly. "I love Christmas."

"Mm-hmm."

They lied in silence for a while before Kairi's expression took on a more serious edge. "Riku?"

"Hmm?"

"You'll still be my – our – friend, if me and Sora… if we… um…" She rolled on her back, turning her pink face towards the garland-trimmed ceiling.

"Kairi." Riku rolled onto his side, placing a hand on her shoulder. She hesitantly looked back towards him. "You and Sora will always be my friends. I think I'mthe one who should be asking that question to you two."

"Riku…" She fidgeted guiltily with the hem of her pajama shirt. "I'm sorry if we… if we've ever made you feel left out… I don't want it to be that way."

"I know." _But you did._ He didn't blame her… it wasn't her fault. Really, that was the truth. Just… sometimes it still hurt, just a little.

"And I'm sorry for punching you a few days ago…"

"It didn't hurt." _But it did. _Not physically… but emotionally it had hit him hard. Of course he knew they liked each other, and in a way it was a relief that they finally went out and got it (almost) over with. But… even though he'd grown up… and he'd accepted that Kairi would end up with Sora… Well, he just hadn't accepted it as well as he'd thought.

But he would. He wanted his best friends to be happy. He wasn't as selfish as he used to be.

"I shouldn't have been mad at you… it's not like you knew we were…"

"Kairi. It's okay." He smiled at her, only a little forced. "The three of us will always be friends, and that's what matters."

She smiled back. "Thank you, Riku. It's nice to hear that from you."

It was nice to say it, too. That no matter what they went through… how many adventures and times torn apart… (no matter how annoying Sora was when he snored…) They would always be best friends.

And that was the only Christmas gift they needed to give each other.

**A/N: Some of you had asked for Riku's POV, so hopefully this satisfied that as well. C: R-2 and "Xen-Xen" are from my other story "Will Prank For Food" and they probably won't show up again. R-2 just decided he felt like multiverse-hopping and he's a decent plot device. The squash juice reference is from the CoM manga, and the Void and Basement references were to various one-shots of mine.**

**In case you must know, Aqua was actually the one I thought hacked the Drop Gauge because she wanted Sora, Riku, and Kairi to be able to spend Christmas together. C:**


	10. Evil Plans

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's reviewed! :D**

**This is for everyone who wanted more stuff with Xemnas and the new Organization. C: This takes place before the events of chapter 5, by the way.**

Meetings were rather irritating for Xemnas these days. No longer did he get to sit in the highest chair of the Room Where Nothing Gathers, and he now had to listen to Impetus's monologues instead of imposing his own upon the old Organization. And Impetus wasn't even a good monologuer. If he thought the younger version of himself would listen, Xemnas would've given him advice to praise Kingdom Hearts more. She always shone more radiantly when he did that… Before DiZ-I-mean-Ansem blew her up, anyway.

So when Xemnas was informed that Impetus had called a meeting again, he was less than pleased. But at least it wasn't in the Round Room, so he wouldn't have to suffer the indignity of sitting in the third-lowest chair.

"What are we being called for, anyway? I was in the middle of pwning my Snipers at Blackjack."

"I have received no information other than that we are to meet in the Vault of Projected Illusions," Xemnas replied to the Freeshooter.

"The movie room? Is the Imp planning a cutscene marathon? I heard the guys over at Castle Lampshade had one of those a few days ago." Xigbar followed Xemnas down the hallway, levitating a few feet off the ground just because he felt like it. Saïx joined them from one of the intersecting corridors.

"What is this Castle Lampshade?" He inquired.

"Ah, you've never been there." Xigbar waved a hand flippantly. "Technically it's supposed to be off-limits for us on this side of the Fourth Wall, but I couldn't help myself. Had to refill my microwave burrito stock from somewhere." He chuckled. "Lucked out on getting the space-warp powers out of the Semi-Random-Element-Lottery."

"…Indeed," Saïx said somewhat enviously. It was hard not to be jealous when he was stuck with one of the most useless elements, which was only more useless now that Kingdom Hearts was gone and there was no moon to draw power from. Even Nothingness might've been better. "Where is the meeting to be held?"

"The Vault of Projected Illusions," Xemnas answered. Saïx nodded mutely.

Xigbar tried to start a conversation during the rest of their long walk through the castle, but Xemnas was inwardly lamenting on how the light of his Kingdom Hearts no longer illuminated the halls, and Dusks could hold up a conversation better than the new version of Saïx.

"I kinda miss when you were arrogant and snarky," Xigbar muttered under his breath after Saïx failed to react to a werewolf joke.

At last, they arrived in the Vault of Projected Illusions, which was essentially the Organization's in-castle movie theater. It hadn't seen much use since the new Organization moved in, but the lesser Nobodies had apparently taken a liking to it, if the "NOBODYZ PWN HARTLSS" graffiti covering the walls was anything to judge by.

Xemnas took his seat first, taking up both of the armrests in the same way as when he sat on his throne, only this time it involved taking Saïx's personal space. The Lunar Diviner stared at his old Superior's arm and sighed. With a grin Xigbar stretched out his legs and lounged on Saïx's other armrest, earning an irritated glare.

"What's your problem?" Xigbar teased. No other response, but hey, a glare was better than nothing. Maybe the ex-Number VII was starting to grow back his personality.

Impetus stood at the front of the room, tossing one of his blue ethereal blades from hand to hand impatiently. Aside from Xemnas, Saïx, and Xigbar, who were seated in the second row of the middle section, there were only two other members gathered so far. Ansem Seeker of Darkness sat in the very back, sulking and stroking his Guardian like it was a cat instead of a frightening dark monster, and Vanitas snapped at his Floods to not associate with "that loser and his wimpy pet."

"I thought I saw Vani at Castle Lampshade," Xigbar mused. "This must be some big meeting."

"Perhaps Master Xehanort is gathering anyone who ever associated with darkness," Xemnas said.

He turned out to be right. Disney and Square Enix villains alike gathered in the theater, even technically-good characters like Terra and Repliku and Roxas, who looked rather confused.

"We're not supposed to Drop like Riku and Sora, are we?" Roxas asked, glancing at the bar that had appeared at the bottom of his vision, just like the main characters' Drop Gauges. Repliku shook his head.

"Aqua didn't program this. Someone must've hacked our system."

Terra and Roxas both trusted him on that. He spent enough time debugging with Data-Riku to know what he was talking about.

Xigbar grinned and elbowed Saïx, nodding in the direction of the new arrivals. "Hey, take a look down there."

"Roxas?" The light was dim, but that was certainly the figure that the Luna Diviner saw. "He can't be here of his free will."

"Maybe they brainwashed him again, like they did you." Xigbar shrugged. "Seems unlikely, though. I saw him at C.L. too."

"And there is the Riku replica and Terra, as well," Xemnas added. He felt a strange pang of sadness when he saw the young man from whom he had inherited his body. "Surely Master Xehanort doesn't mean to recruit them?"

Saïx's eyes widened. "Of course. A recruitment drive."

"Ahh," Xigbar said in understanding. "So that's what all the fuss is about."

Suddenly a platform stage rose in front of the movie screen, and Impetus strutted up onto it. He surveyed the loud and violent crowd – Terra had found Vanitas and Repliku was trying to prevent a fistfight between the two, and several other villains had begun to squabble, threaten, or maim each other.

"Attention, lesser beings," Impetus called over a microphone that magically appeared in his hand. "Stop this nonsense and separate yourselves; Disney villains on the left, Square Enix villains on the right."

Most of the villains glared at him, not wanting to take orders from a silver-haired pretty boy with ego issues. Roxas called out, "What if we're not villains?"

"Square Enix side," Impetus ordered again.

"I'm not going to sit here and listen to you!" Roxas yelled.

"That kid's big mouth is gonna get him in trouble," Xigbar muttered even as he was grinning.

"Hmm. I can't see how he would be useful to this Organization, considering he was a major flaw in our old one," Xemnas added. Saïx shrugged, not offering an opinion.

Terra and Roxas both summoned their keyblades and Repliku summoned Soul Eater, sending various levels of panic, laughter, and general chaos through the crowd of villains. Impetus simply cast Stopga on the trio.

"Anyone else object to hearing me out? No? Good." Impetus smirked. "You will all be free to leave after this short video and a few questions. We appreciate your cooperation."

XXX WHY YOU SHOULD JOIN THE NEW ORGANIZATION XIII XXX

The old Master Xehanort's image flickered onto the projector screen, hunched and creepy-looking as ever. In the background lay the Keyblade Graveyard. Not the most appealing place to shoot a recruitment video.

"Welcome, all followers of darkness. My name is Master Xehanort, as I am sure you know. Obviously by this point in time I've already completed several evil plots and made all of you hate me."

(Vanitas attempted to cuss out the old guy, but the Disney censors muted him.)

Master Xehanort cleared his throat, which sounded like a cat coughing up a hairball. (Later on the villains noticed that Lucifer _had _coughed up a hairball, right on top of Drizella's dress.) "Nevertheless, I have a proposition for you. Several accurate sources say that to forge the X-Blade, one needs seven hearts of pure light and thirteen hearts of pure darkness."

("_Several accurate sources_?" Xigbar snorted. "As if." But he was already half-Xehanort, so what could he do?)

"There are always hearts of pure light. Pesky things pop up everywhere. What we need is the thirteen of darkness."

(_So that's why we were called Organization XIII even before there were thirteen of us, _Saïx realized. _Did Xemnas remember Xehanort's plans?)_

Master Xehanort continued to say on-screen, "You are probably wondering what benefits there are to turning over your heart to the darkness and basically letting me possess you. I can assure you that there are no harmful side-effects, unless you count complete lack of free will as a harmful side-effect—" *COUGH COUGH COUGH* "I MEAN, no, there are no harmful side-effects whatsoever."

(Xigbar and Saïx rolled their eyes. Had Terra not still been under the Stop spell, he would've rolled his eyes too.

"_Even Terra's not dumb enough to believe that!" _Vanitas shouted, then went back to trying to come up with creative swears that the Disney censors wouldn't mute.)

"As for benefits, the most important one is that you will be my pawn—er, ally—in taking over the universe, so you get all the benefits of an Evil Overlord. If that isn't convincing enough, you also get to stay in this lovely castle-"

(_How does he know we're watching this in a castle? _Saïx wondered.)

"-have the lesser Nobodies as your servants, and have amazing sparkly molten-gold eyes like mine."

(Xemnas, Xigbar, and Saïx stared at each other.

"It's really more like a topaz-" Xigbar began, but Saïx cut him off with a simple "Shut up, Xigbar."

"The zombie speaks!" The Freeshooter laughed, clapping Saïx on the back. "Maybe there's still hope for you, Moony.")

"So, at this point would all who are interested in joining the New Organization XIII please step forward. One of my other incarnations will take over from this point. Thank you all for your cooperation."

From off-screen a voice called, "Hey, why are you talking to yourself?"

Master Xehanort turned to his right and rasped, "Vanitas! You're supposed to be in Disney Town!"

"Are you rehearsing your proposal to Kingdom Hearts again?" Vanitas's voice asked, ignoring orders.

"No, I'm-!" Master Xehanort glared back at the screen and turned off the camera. The projector flickered off.

XXX

"So _that's _what he was doing!" Vanitas cackled. "Too bad I never actually caught his proposal practice on video, though…"

Impetus coughed, trying to hide his embarrassment at failing to turn off the projector before the interruption. He knew he should've previewed the video before the meeting. Now the majority of the villains, Vanitas especially, were laughing without trying to restrain themselves.

"SILENCE, before I cast Stopga on all of you," Impetus threatened loudly. At that moment his previous Stopga spell wore off of Roxas, Terra, and Repliku, who exchanged glances and silently decided to attempt to sneak out. Which would've worked much better if any of them knew the way out, and if they weren't surrounded by villains on all sides.

"Hey," Vanitas whispered to them, "You want out of here, right?"

"…Yeah?" Roxas answered hesitantly.

Without warning, Vanitas flicked his wrist to cast a dark spell over them that made them invisible.

"Woah! You can do that?!" Roxas exclaimed.

Vanitas rolled his eyes. _"Obviously, _since I just did. Now hurry up before it wears off."

"Wait, but why are you helping us?" Terra asked.

"You really are an idiot. I hate Xehanort just as much as you guys do. Just promise me you'll give him a good Boss Battle when you get up there, and I'll teleport up to meet you."

Roxas nodded, forgetting he was invisible. Repliku was the one to answer, "Sure, why not?"

Back at the front of the room, Impetus ordered, "Those who wish to join the New Organization XIII, step forward onto the stage."

Silence.

"I _said, _step forward onto the stage." He glared. One of the less-intelligent Disney villains who hadn't been a part of Maleficent's conspiracy in the first game was the first volunteer.

"Nobody steps onto stages like Gaston!" Gaston proudly announced, strutting up to stand beside Impetus, who was beginning to think this was a horrible idea.

"I see," he muttered, side-stepping away. "So how do you plan to be useful to our Organization?"

"Organization?" Gaston blinked. Impetus wanted to facepalm.

"Were you paying any attention to the video? At all?"

Gaston looked affronted. "Did you expect me to watch that old man with the creepy hunch? Of course I didn't."

Xigbar chuckled at the fury on Impetus's face. "Heh, maybe this meeting wasn't so pointless after all."

"Clearly it _is _pointless; we can't recruit heathens like him. They show no loyalty or devotion to Kingdom Hearts."

Saïx sighed. "It will be best if this all ends in failure." He wouldn't wish his fate on anyone, not even his most hated enemy. Well, his most hated enemy _was _Xehanort, so that wouldn't have worked anyway.

Back on stage, Impetus had cast Blizzaga on Gaston, making the other villains roar with laughter. They weren't paying any attention to Roxas, Terra, and Repliku, who were crawling past their legs and out of the isle.

"Ugh, this is disgusting," Repliku complained, flicking pieces of popcorn away and trying to avoid spiked boots and other villainous footwear.

"Yeah, well at least you can squeeze through a lot easier than I can…" Terra muttered. He was invisible, but not intangible. It was a miracle none of the villains had paid any attention to him squishing their legs.

"How much farther…?" Terra's and Repliku's forms were fading back into visibility, and Roxas couldn't see past them.

Finally they made it to the edge of the room, where the run to the door was a straight shot. Unfortunately, they were also now completely visible and exposed to Impetus's gaze, and he was done dealing with Gaston.

"Charge him!" Repliku yelled, even though that plan had epically failed last time. Vanitas teleported onstage, distracting Impetus with a swipe of Void Gear that knocked his Ethereal Blades away. The villains were cheering now, calling out "VANITAS! VANITAS!" for those who knew his name, and "KID IN THE SKIRT!" for those who didn't.

"IT'S NOT A SKIRT!" Vanitas roared, taking out his annoyance with a flurry of blows that Impetus barely parried.

By now Roxas, Repliku, and Terra had made it on stage and were about to charge Impetus from behind. Four-against-one didn't seem like the best odds for him.

"This is more trouble than it's worth," he decided with a sigh. Holding up his hand, he cast a spell to skip ahead in time until an alarm started blaring. All the villains (and non-villains present) winced and covered their ears.

"Hey, isn't this what it sounds like when Riku or Sora's—?" Roxas began to ask.

But then everyone except for the original members of the New Organization XIII dropped.

Impetus dismissed his Ethereal Blades, rubbed his temples, and walked offstage, muttering about a decline in the standards of villainy these days. The other members were left with no explanation for the sudden mass exodus.

Xigbar stood up and stretched, cracking his back. "Well, that was interesting."

"No one has joined the cause of Kingdom Hearts," Xemnas said sulkily. "This meeting was an utter disappointment."

Saïx shrugged. "Kingdom Hearts doesn't need them," he said to appease Xemnas, though he was fine with no new members being picked. It was also a relief to not have Xemnas and Xigbar stealing his armrest space anymore.

"You're right, Saïx," Xemnas said, smiling. "We are her most devoted subjects. Why would she need those useless heretics?"

"Speak for yourself, Xemmy," Xigbar muttered, rolling his eyes, though he was smiling. "I'm gonna go back to my Blackjack game. You guys want in?"

Saïx didn't particularly want to play, but it was better than sulking in his room, so he nodded.

"There are hearts on Blackjack cards, right?" Xemnas asked dubiously. Xigbar laughed.

"Yup. Allll the hearts you could want. Jack, Queen, King, Ace…"

"You had me at hearts."

**A/N: I love making fun of Xemnas so much… ^^; Vanitas is also fun to write. Most characters are fun to write in this, actually, even characters I don't like such as Xehanort. And I couldn't resist the Gaston cameo. XD**


End file.
